Labeling en Vogue for ADHD'ers!

Hello! I have decided to start writing again! Some of you found my writing inspiring, funny, helpful, maybe even entertaining at times...and that gives me the hope that you will, again, find some purpose for reading my writing. I'm excited to get back into a hobby that brought me so much joy in the past.

I do, however, pay attention to the number of "followers" I have...it lets me know that someone looks forward to reading a post...thereby giving me the incentive I need to keep going. (Wasn't that a clever way to bribe you to read my blog more?)

Let's get right down to business...

I'm thinking of sending this photo to CHADD, an organization dedicated to educating and helping adults and children with ADD, in hopes that I win some multimillion dollar prize and pay off all of my debt! Wouldn't that be wonderful??

I know, it's not THAT good of a photo...but it is a glimpse into the life of a child with ADHD: when my 9 year old daughter, Jolee, remembers that there are baby birds living in our birdhouse she will NOT be able to resist the temptation to reach in and hold them...again.

We had friends over to celebrate Memorial Day in our traditional fashion...mellow afternoon, kids playing, adults socializing. Normal stuff.

All of a sudden I overhear a friend's daughter explain that she had just held a baby bird "so small that it didn't have any feathers and it's eyes weren't open!"

JOLEE! (said in the same tone Jerry Seinfeld used when he said "NEWMAN!"

I had purposely kept the birds secret. I had TRIED to keep it secret, anyway. But on that fateful Memorial Day I knew that my efforts had been thwarted. Jolee had discovered the birds all on her own and had been in there picking them up and putting them back in! I feared the tale was true, that the momma chickadee wouldn't come back to her babies once she smelled the scent of humans.

Luckily that legend does not pertain to THIS family of chickadees!

Momma AND Pappa were back in no time checking in on their babies.

Now, most people would say that I'm irresponsible leaving a nesting box within kid's reach. I was starting to believe that myself.

But then I remembered a piece of advice suggesting that labeling things makes it easier for children (and adults for that matter) to remember where things go and what activities to do. ie. I have all of my older daughter's drawers labeled to help her remember that things DO fit in the dresser...you just need to put things in their places. The bonus is that she feels like she has more clothes because she can see everything clearly.

So I labeled the birdhouse. 

Now, hopefully, when Jolee is tempted to reach in and see how the chicks are doing (which she most likely will some moment very soon) she will see the "stop" sign and remember.

And this is a photo of some doodling I did based on what I decided to do with my afternoon...
that's right! Have fun.

and I hope you've had a least a little bit of fun reading this post! Thanks for taking the time to read my musings.

Expressions of Life

I have fallen in love.
Fallen in love with yoga.
It allows me to surrender, to feel, to love, to Be.
and it allows my body a certain stillness that cannot be achieved in day to day life.
I can push myself, feel my outer limits of strength and then curl into myself and honor who I am and what I have within myself...strength, peace, kindness and love.

A few weeks ago I had an amazingly moving experience while practicing yoga at Jai Yoga in Brunswick. My teacher, Jen, is 7 months pregnant. She exudes confidence, patience, calmness and is absolutely beautiful in her expression of her pregnancy.

I was positioned in a corner of the studio, looking out the large windows. The sky outside was a brilliant blue, a few puffy white clouds hung in the air. I gazed down to the crowded parking lot where my van was parked. My van holding my old, decrepit black lab, Gracy.

I was so struck by the dichotomy of my experience. To my right was the perfect expression of life. A beautiful, vivacious, living woman growing a perfect expression of life in her womb. Just outside the window lay my Gracy Lou who, at 14, is at the end of her life. Her hips are failing her, her body is not strong, her hearing is gone, her vision blurry. The perfect expression of  life ending in my van.

I had to hold back my tears. Not tears of sadness...mind you, but tears of experience. The joy of new life, the reflection of a life of happiness with my dog.

As you move through your life today, try to reflect on life...what around you is the perfect expression of life? Of death?

Spring is the perfect time for this reflection. Everything is new...new beginnings...the plants burst forth and put forward their perfect expression of life, baby animals are being born, each of us feel enlivened and ready for our fresh start that is Spring.

And death...what is dying in you? What can you leave behind with the cold and darkness of winter? Don't just put it on a shelf for next year. See if you can release it in the eastern wind that blows the coldness and staleness away.

I dare you.

Valentine's on the Mind...

 This project started with a grand idea while laying on the couch nursing a sore neck. Some of my most brilliant work begins this way! I wanted to have a fun project ready for the girls when they got home from school and this proved to fit the bill.

Paper bags and ....SNACKS!

I gathered some paper bags and cut them to lay flat on my table. I had so much fun reminiscing about covering my text books in junior high and high school with these paper bags. I did, however, notice that Trader Joe's bags are much more artsy than the bags we used to get from Mister Market!

Paper bags were NEVER this beautiful in the 80's!

I then decided that I needed a tablecloth. I unearthed the sheet I had used as a tablecloth last Thanksgiving. It brought back lots of fantastic memories as I read the things our guests had been thankful for that day. 

The girls came home and got right to work. They were so excited to have free range with their paint colors and to be using sponges

 

 The end results were beautiful! I tried my hand at sewing them on my machine, but got a bit frustrated with how they were coming out.
So the next day, I went into the studio and took it up a notch and created this lovely string of hearts...Jolee had a day off from school, so she painted, I cut and sewed and she stuffed. Fun, fun FUN!

Bored in Bed

she starts to fall....
she can feel herself falling farther....
and she finally crashes...

I cannot believe that I have been sick for so long. More than a week. A week ago, I was hit really hard...but it was days before that I felt myself sinking. I just never thought it would happen. I don't get sick. I keep going. I'm the energizer bunny! I am everything to everyone and still manage to keep strong!

Not this time.

Have I learned anything?

I have learned that it sucks to be idle. I have dreamed about this for a long time...imagining myself in an institution somewhere where I can just be heavily sedated and lay in bed and look outside all day. Well, it's not what it's cracked up to be, that's for sure. I am laying here. Moderately sedated...codeine takes the edge off, I guess...and I am looking outside. My dog is my trusty companion and jerry the cat comes and checks in every few hours or so. My door is locked so that the kids cannot just randomly come in and jump on me...it's kind of like that institution.

I've decided that I don't want that option.

I cannot do laundry.
I cannot clean the toilet
I cannot even take a shower! hannah, you do not want to KNOW how long it's been!!!

I have read 2 1/2 books
I have thought about writing...it would probably be a great time to write that novel in my head...
I have cried
I have found lots of monster faces in the trees outside
I have listened to the lovely tones of the wind chimes just outside my window...laura, the ones you got for us...remember?

and I have slept.

I think that codeine enhances dreams. wowza! I have been having dreams like crazy! and in most of them, I cannot stand up! I keep falling down. It's so annoying!!!

Such an interesting existence I have right now.

and my mind still wanders back to my little sister....
oh, I should be writing about that. SHOULD. that's such a big word....

Fall Harvest...

Not much to say today...except that my husband went out of town for the week and I'm TOAST already! We had an impromptu haircut (NOT by me), a pretty-darned-close-to-the-eye injury from a flying metal serving tray...is that enough? 'Cause, if not, I'm sure I can come up with more!

But, the great news is that I harvested all of our carrots today...as you can see above! They are beautiful! Gracy and Elvia helped me...Gracy LOVES eating carrots and was laying beside me begging the entire time.


This lovely was done by Jolee and me. She did the base painting and glued various papers and things on. I tried my hand at drawing Jolee but it's not even close! Oh well! The upper body is whacked out...but I had fun and Jolee did too! Another idea/inspiration from Kelly Rae Roberts...I highly suggest her book!

Catching up...

Things have been quite lively here...getting ready for winter (sigh....) and having fun during this beautiful fall!

I spent a lovely weekend away at Kieve last weekend...having a blast with some of my very wonderful women friends. It's so funny to look around the table at women that I would never dream to be friends with, and realize that they are some of my closest "people." I share A LOT with them...maybe TOO much!!!

Anyone got a dollar bill????? (Inside joke for this fall's group!)

Anywho...

Painting anyone? Jolee and Elvia did an outstanding job painting these pieces of a birdhouse. We have it almost constructed...more photos of it completed later.

And a piece of art. It wouldn't be a posting without art, right?

Art and BASIL!

It's been too long...I know. I've been busy! But, now Fall is in full swing and I'm back to living more indoors than out and finding more time to be creative. Phew!
Here's a preview of yesterday:



we started the day with some painting! The girls got "into it" a little more than I did...I was more tame and followed instructions from Kelly Rae Robert's FABULOUS book, Taking Flight. I don't love it yet...but it's still a work in progress:

And then came the BASIL!!! 2 POUNDS of Basil to be cleaned and then made into....
PESTO!!!!

Happy Mother's Day!

I had a wonderful Mother's Day.

My family made me a scrumptious breakfast: egg sandwich, strawberries, coffee and orange juice...all served outside on our patio. I had lots of lovely gifts...a new basket/tote filled with gardening goodies and a JoAnn giftcard! My thoughtful husband also got me a "grow-light" contraption for starting seedlings. He's so thoughtful!!! They also bought me some beautiful purple pansies...lovely!

We went to Lowell's cove just in time for low tide. I looked for sea glass and other treasures while everyone else had fun in the water. I know, ocean water in Maine in MAY!!! Craziness!!!


We then went to lunch at a lovely cafe in Harpswell.

We came home, I made some art. Donny made an amazing dinner and now I get to share my creations with you!

Enjoy!

Art...finally!

Finally...I made some art! I was inspired while looking through a past issue of Cloth, Paper, Scissors magazine. It's nothing glamorous, but it filled my soul last night while creating her. I'm not sure what I'll do with her.

I have this issue with creating art. I feel like everything I make should be able to be sold. Crazy, huh? That feeling keeps me from making things like this "Joy Within" piece. I can't sell her. I ripped off the idea from another artist and it's very personal to me. that's good, right? I SHOULD be making art for ME, right?

The weekend was great. We went to Wolf's Neck Farm on Saturday and met our good friends, Becca and Rob and their kids there. There were, of course, poop stories. I'll spare you all from them. Let's just say they had more then chicken manure on their lawn that day....

Yesterday Lorraine came down and we had a great time looking at old photos and reminiscing. My favorite part of the day was preparing dinner while Meka, Lorraine and Donny were playing Parcheesi. Listening to their laughter and discussion filled me up with sunshine.

And back to reality on Monday morning! Meka went back to school today and Jolee and Elvia are playing "puppy." Thank goodness they are playing and not attacking each other!!!

Post Birthday Update

This post is for those of you who read my post and thought, "oh, gee, Leslie has LOST her MIND!!!"

The REST of my 39th birthday was just lovely. I received phone calls from all of my parents, biological and otherwise. Even Barry remembered and called me last night! I was quite moved by them all calling me to wish me well on my "special" day. I received a riotous card from my dear friend, Vicki, and it brought me back to silly days in high school. The end of the night, however, was the highlight of my day.

I had brought the girls to Target for some "retail therapy" and got home to find the table lovingly set with my purple dish ware and purple tulips and a nice bottle of wine. Donny had gone to "Doug's" (a.k.a. Scarlet Begonia's) to get dinner. He and Doug designed a meal just for me! I had my very own, personalized Doug special! It was so delicious! Scallops, spinach and roasted red peppers in a pesto cream sauce. Oooh, la la!!!

And dessert...

My very favorite: German chocolate cake. We tried a new bakery, the European Bakery in Falmouth, and it was TO DIE FOR!!!

I think you all recall my foiled TJ Maxx shopping experience??? Well, Donny managed to surprise me with a gift certificate there to spend on myself. After dinner, I said "see ya!" to the family and went shopping! Hannah met me out and, after TJ Maxx, we went to Borders and browsed until 10.

So, see? I'm okay. I'm NOT losing my mind. Just a little bit here and there...nothing to get your panties in a wrinkle over.

New craft project? These LOVELY knitted fairy dolls in this month's issue of Living Crafts magazine.

Almost finished blanket...

So here is the blanket that I promised an image of. It's not completed. I did edging around the outside of it and it looked darling once it was finished. I'm working on another one right now. The edging is a bit of a challenge, as the squares are all different sizes.

Here are a few photos of the girls last week during our shaving cream/finger painting escapade! It's times like these when I think that I'm doing a good job as a mom...when I actually think of fun, silly things for the kids to do and not worry about how much of a mess it will make. And a mess it DID make!

My good friend, Denise, told me about another messy activity to do with the girls...fill a bin with play sand and put it on a sheet. What fun! The girls played in the sand for at least an hour. When they were all done, I simply folded the sheet, shook the excess sand back into the bin and the mess was all cleaned up! A great sensory exercise!

This past weekend I traveled to Massachusetts to visit with my dear friend, Gina and to visit with my Aunt in the hospital. I had a wonderful time with Gina. It's amazing that we can be in such different places in life, but understand one another so perfectly. She's going through fertility crap and I ache for her. All of the feelings came rushing back to me while I was listening to her. The hatred for anyone who is pregnant or just had a baby. It's so irrational, but so real. I'm so glad I'm not there anymore. I still yearn for the experience of being pregnant and being in "the club," but know that 4 children would put me over the top, WAY over the top!

My Aunt...that's another story...

We had such a nice visit. It was so strange to be alone with her. We used to spend so much time together. I remember visiting with her when Donny and I had broken up and her offering me so much solace. I was so sad at the time. We would go for long walks and just talk, talk and talk. Of course, she scared me into becoming born-again and I went a little off the deep end of Christianity for a bit...but I found my way back to reality!

Anyway...the hospital visit was so good. We talked about the old times...cooking together, playing all of the time...my mom, her relationship with her children, how disappointed she is at the way life turned out. We talked about her dying...how she's not afraid, almost looking forward to what's coming next. It was such a good visit...but then she told me that she was sneaking wine into the hospital.

Why??? I just don't understand addiction. I have had my share of them...bulimia was nothing to sneeze at...but I KNEW the entire time that I had a problem. I was aware of what I was doing to myself. She is in complete denial. Here she is in the hospital, dying due to cirrhosis of the liver caused from drinking...and she's STILL drinking???!!?? It's like the person with emphysema who continues to smoke. I don't get it.

And then I did something that I'm still struggling with. I told the nurse. She thanked me for telling her and then told me that she had to address it. I was sorry that I had told her. Who am I to play God and tell my Aunt what she can and cannot do? I did it out of love, that goes without saying...but there are other parts of it as well. It's done and I have to live with it...but I have remorse.

Today it's raining. I am SO tired of winter!!! I want to run away to a deserted island with my family and never come back!!!

Tax Hell...

That's where I am...tax hell. I do this to myself EVERY year! In January...or February...I am a lunatic trying to get everything ready so that I can file our financial aid application in time...by February 15th. And each year I say the same damn thing, "this year I will be better at keeping records so that taxes will be easy next year..."

and I never do it!

So what ends up happening is me filing the taxes with my fingers and toes crossed that we NEVER get audited!

I'll be back with art one of these days!!!

The snow is still falling...it's so incredibly beautiful outside. Jolee is snuggling with me in my lap. Meka is taking a much needed rest time in her room and Elvia is debating on getting up from her non-nap in her room. I'm listening to "smoky" jazz on Pandora...my recent "online radio" addiction.

I've made an art decision..

sounds big, doesn't it?

Not really. I'm going to focus on a letter and go crazy coming up with silly sayings for that letter. Princess Penelope started me off. Stay tuned for more P creations!!! I have a few fun sayings...now I need to create art to go with them! I hope you enjoy Princess Penelope. I just love her!

Superbowl Sunday

Will the Pats win? Do I really care? no. I do not. I view football as a silly game. Full grown men dress up in costumes and run up and down a field, attacking one another...and get paid MILLIONS of dollars to do so. Makes my skin crawl! What about our national debt? Can we use some of their salaries to pay that? Or, better yet, what about all of the starving children in our country, let alone the world? Abused kids? Kids with cancer?

Can we give the money to them???

No. We must keep paying these men to run up and down a field in their costumes.

Okay, enough ranting.

art? sure. here's some!
I did these Valentine ATC's last week. I had so much fun making them. The "fairest hippy" has glitter paint on it...that's why it looks so grainy.

On a more serious note...My mother-in-law had a heart attack last week. Come to find out, ti wasn't technically a heart attack, but it's the easiest way to describe it. Either that, or picture your heart experiencing a charlie horse. Ouch.

I finally felt it today. I was sitting in church, listening to Full Circle sing and just started crying. I suddenly realized that, between Donny being sick all week and his mother in the hospital, I was spent. Emotionally spent. I had not taken any time at all to just cry. I haven't allowed myself the time and space to just "be." It was so amazing to be surrounded by this beautiful music. I just let myself go and what I found was a weakened me. I have been taking care of so many people this week, this month, this year...that I haven't been taking care of me at all.

Back to Lorraine...she's fine. She's home now. She has to rest. What a huge scare. I have been feeling anger and frustration toward her since I learned that she doesn't approve of our decision to take a "kid-free" vacation this spring. It's just amazing how all of the crap we carry with us from day to day just melts away when faced with death. To see her so vulnerable, so scared...to see Donny so scared and so sad...perspective is what I gained. I love her dearly and am so thankful that she is well.

And now I will sign off for the night.

Catching up...

I DID cook meals, or plan meals, all last week, but didn't have time to post them! I even took a photo of my salmon marinating! So here's my list (I already told you about Tuesday and Wednesday, exciting as they were!):

Thursday: Thursdays are always hard because I take Meka to horseback riding and we don't get home until 5:30-6pm. This week, however, Donny took her so I had a chance to prepare dinner!
Menu: Marinated salmon, rice pilaf (Near East roasted garlic) and steamed broccoli (the girls get a charge out of having "eat the tree" contests)

Salmon recipe:
1 cup soy sauce (I use Bragg's Liquid Aminos...I perceive it as more healthy :-)
1 cup white wine (I bought a "box-o-wine" and keep it in the pantry for cooking adventures)
2 tbsp chopped garlic (I buy it in a jar already chopped)
1 tbsp chopped ginger (again, from a jar)
mix all together, add salmon and marinate for as long as possible (1 hour was all we had today but I have my nifty sealer container that makes marinating fast and easy!). I usually grill the salmon, but I broiled it instead. The salmon is done when it flakes with a fork.
Delicious!

Friday: Our household favorite that reminds me of Lindsey every time we have it...chicken, penne and broccoli tossed with an alfredo/pesto mixture. Recipe: cook chicken. cook penne. steam broccoli. Throw together and put on a bunch of pesto cut 1/2 with alfredo. All from a jar. Simple and delicioso!

Elvia and Jolee had a wonderful time painting on Friday morning. We learned all about Blue and Red! The brushes, mind you, were a means to and end. An end which resulted in very RED and very BLUE hands!

My weekend was super fun. Friday afternoon I took Jolee and Meka skating at the ice rink in Falmouth. The school has ice time rented throughout the winter on Fridays from 2-3. Jolee was not so sure that skating was all that fun, especially when she fell over and over and over again. We found a folding metal chair and pushed her around and that was MUCH more her style!

Saturday morning I got up, got ready and got the hell outta dodge! Hannah, Lizzie and I took a road trip to visit "friend Laurie" at her digs at the Portsmouth Naval Shipyard. She's a Captain in the Air Force getting her master's degree and is living at the Naval base for a spell. Her husband, Brunu, cooked us an amazing authentic Portuguese lunch and then shooed us off to the craft store Absolutely Everything in Topsfield, MA. We got home, primped and then went into Portsmouth for dinner. We ended up eating at a brew pub and had a great time. I cannot divulge and of our dinner conversation topics, but let's just say we all learned A LOT about each other!!!

We tried to go out dancing but the bands just weren't doin' it for us. We went home, ate some chips and ice cream and went to bed around midnight.

Sunday morning, Laurie cooked us yummy blueberry pancakes and then sent us on our way. There was a tricky snowstorm that slowed us down a bit on the way home, but we made it safe and sound.

I arrived to find a VERY sick husband and three crabby girls! I sent him to bed and managed to maintain some semblance of peace for the rest of the day. We even made cookies!

I managed to get the three girls up, dressed and fed and all of us OUT the door by 8:05 this morning! We were a little late for school, but I had to cut myself a little bit of slack!

Donny went to the doctor and has influenza (the FLU!) so he's resting and I'm trying my darndest to baby him! It does NOT come naturally to me. I have too many other little people to baby!

'til tomorrow!